I do marketing and video editing for clients. The videos I make for them come out polished and handsome.
So when I look at my own videos, part of me wants them to be that polished too.
I have come to think that does not matter. Attractive or not is beside the point. What matters is getting the thought across to people, the thoughts that might actually help someone.
The same is exactly true of English
I say this to students: when you write or speak, if your mind is permanently on your own grammar, your own vocabulary, your own pronunciation, then you are in fact thinking about yourself far too much.
Because when you speak, when you write, the purpose is for the other person to receive your meaning.
So why is all of your attention pointed inwards?
The question to ask instead
Rather than "is my grammar correct", ask:
- How much of that did they understand?
- Did the message actually land?
That is the real objective.
And what is interesting is that when you move your attention onto the listener, you usually speak noticeably better. Because now you are concentrating on making yourself understood, rather than on avoiding judgement.